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The Laws of Ducks by Ken Fussichen, 1998

Duck Law No. 1 -

If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, looks like a duck & cooks like a duck, it's a duck.

Restatement: All things are known by their attributes.

Duck Law No. 2 -

Even under ideal circumstances, no duck, no matter how noble or well-intentioned, can be an eagle.

Restatement: All things must be what they are.

Duck Law No. 3 -

A duck can pretend to be an eagle except in times of adversity.

Restatement: Pretense and adversity are inversely proportional; adversity reveals the true nature of all things.

Duck Law No 4 -

No duck may be an eagle until it abandons its webbed feet and bill for talons and a beak.

Restatement: All things remain as they are until the attributes that define them are abandoned. Then, and only then, can they evolve.

Duck Law No. 5 -

Ducks are noble creatures. They shall not be penalized in the eyes of other creatures because they are not eagles.

Restatement: All things are honorable if they are what they are honestly, even if they are different from you.

Duck Law No. 6 -

The greatest duck that ever was cannot fly as high as even a modest eagle.

Restatement: If one would soar with eagles, do not swim with ducks.

Duck Law No. 7 -

Ducks flock. Eagles fly alone. Ducks and eagles never mingle.

Restatement: Choose company wisely.

Duck Law No. 8 -

A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.

Restatement: Sometimes there is no answer.

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