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This is the kind of contrived and maudlin horse-pucky that almost makes me wish I were a nice person. When I count to ten, thank goodness, the feeling passes.

It reminds me of a true story, though. I might have got it from one of you; I've received so many d*mned joke emails from some of you characters that I save them in the recycle bin under spam.

Seems this guy was walking along Great Kills Beach one fine summer day when he stubs his toe on a bottle in the sand and out pops a Genii, Great Kills Version. Being a NooYawk genii, he cuts to the chase and tells our boy he's got one wish, anything he wants.

Our boy says "I always wanted to visit Germany and drop in on DBlivit and hoist a few litres of brau, but I don't like to fly, so how about building me a four lane highway across the Atlantic to Europe."

Genii thinks a bit and replies, "Geez, four lanes, that's a lot of concrete pilings and roadbed, and lots of union labor; across the Atlantic, that'll take a long time, can't you think of something simpler that I can do faster?"

O.B. says, "Well, my wife is always after me to be more thoughtful, considerate and loving; do you think you could make me satisfactory to my wife?"

Genii scratches his head a moment and sez, "How many lanes did you say?"

-rs



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