Staten Island Web logo



Snow YES!~ YES~ YES!~ Dan Blaine DBLIVIT blaine@eucom.mil On 01/17/2000 5:26:00 PM, sjsinger wrote:
>I have seen snow but three
>times since I left the Island
>in 1941 and glad that it is
>behind me. Right now it is
>sunny and eighty degrees here
>in good ole Houston, Texas.
>could use some rain. Haven't
>seen rain in so long, I forget
>what feels like.
>
>Stan Singer

Stan: let us know if this "guide to Houston" still fits:

->
> 1. Houston is comprised entirely of one way streets. The only way to
> get out of downtown Houston is to turn around and start over when you
> reach Dallas, Texas.

> 2. All directions start with, "Go down Westheimer..."

> 3. Westheimer has no beginning and no end.

> 4. Houston is home of Coca Cola. That's all we drink here, so don't
> ask for any other soft drink.

> 5. Houstonians only know their way home and their way to work.

> 6. Gate One at the Airport is 32 miles away from the Main Concourse.

> 7. It's impossible to go around a block and wind up on the street you
> started on. The Chamber of Commerce calls it a "scenic drive".

> 8. The 8 a.m. rush hour is from 6:30 to 9:30 a.m. The 5:00 p.m rush
> hour is from 3:30 to 6:30 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday
morning.

> 9. Reversible Lanes are not understood by anybody.

> 10. "Sir" and "Ma'am" are used by the person speaking to you if there's
a
> remote possibility that you're at least 30 minutes older than they are.

> 11. "Sugar" is a more common form of address than "Miss". So is
"Honey".

> 12. Sjolander can only be pronounced by a native, so do not attempt the
> Spanish pronunciation. People will simply tilt their heads to the right
and> stare at you.

> 13. The falling of one raindrop or (God, forbid) one snowflake causes
all> traffic to immediately cease; so will daylight savings time and a girl
> applying eye shadow across the street, or a flat tire three lanesover.

> 14. If you're standing on a corner and a Metro Bus stops, you're
expected> to get on and go somewhere.

> 15. Houston is pronounced "YEW-STON".

> 16. Construction on the Gulf Freeway is a way of life, and a permanent
form> of entertainment.

> 17. Construction crews aren't doing their job properly unless they close
> down all lanes except one during rush hour.

> 18. Houston's traffic is the friendliest around. The commuters spend
> hours mingling with each other twice a day. In fact, Houston's traffic
is rated number 1 in the country. You will often see people parked beside
the> road and engaged in lively discussions.

> 19. Texas 400 is the southern equivalent of the AutoBahn. You will
rarely see a semi-truck on I-10, because the truck drivers are intimidated by
the oversized-SUV-wielding housewives racing home after a grueling day at the
> salon or the tennis match to meet their children at the schoolbus.

20. Finally, the 95 pound woman driving the Ford Excursion (the largest
> vehicle ever produced in the world) absolutely MUST come to a complete
stop, then proceed at 2.5 mph over any railroad track. Let's face it, this
> vehicle was built to invade small countries with, and she's worried about
> the damn railroad tracks!!!


Regards, DAN (praying for more snow in the Black Forest) BLAINE




Staten Island WebŪ Forums Index.