Pillsbury Dough Boy Harry White hrwhite email@example.com
Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, The Pillsbury Doughboy, died yesterday of a
severe yeast infection and complications of repeated pokes to the belly.
He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent
years. Dozens of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth,
the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, the Hostess
Twinkies, Cap'n Crunch and many others.
The graveside was piled high with flours and longtime friend Aunt Jemima
delivered the eulogy. She described the Doughboy as a man who "never
knew how much he was kneaded."
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled
with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much
of his dough on half-baked schemes. Still, even as a crusty old man, he
was a roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his second wife, Play
Dough. They have two children and one in the oven.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
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