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Back when I was a young sailor, I used to see this a lot. Now, I'm an old retired sailor. I just stumbled across it on the web and couldn't resist passing it along.....

Somewhere between the security of childhood and the insecurity of second childhood, we find a bunch of Good Joes who wear funny pants and who we call "Sailor". They are worked very hard, get very little sleep, take great verbal abuse, do every imaginable kind of job at any imaginable hour, never seem to get paid, never know where they are going and seldom can tell where they have been.

They come in assorted sizes, shapes, weights and stages of sobriety. They can be found anywhere; on ships, in bars, on leave, in debt and always in love. Girls love them, towns tolerate them, and the United States Government supports them.

A sailor is laziness with a deck of cards, bravery with a gun, and the protector of the seas with a copy of Playboy. They have the energy of turtles, the slyness of foxes, the stories of a sea captain, the sincerity of a liar, the appetite of a lion, the aspiration of a casanova, and what they want most of all is usually weekend liberty.

Some of their likes are women, girls, dames, babes, chicks, broads and the opposite sex!! Their dislikes are answering letters, wearing their uniforms, superior officers, lousy chow and getting up on time. No one else can cram into one tiny pocket a black book, a Marilyn Monroe calendar, a picture of his girl, a deck of cards, a set of dice, a beer opener and what is left of last month's pay. He likes to put most of his money on whiskey and women and the rest he spends foolishly.

A sailor is a magical creature: You can lock him out of your house, but not out of your heart. You can put him off your mailing list but not off your mind. You might as well give up, he's your long-away-from-home-lover. He's your one and only blurry bloodshot-eye-good-for-nothing worry.

But all these faults seem insignificant when your sailor is back and he looks you in the eyes and says, "Hi, Honey. I'm home".

Author unknown


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