Ok, now that I cleared up my spiritual journey, the "what" that I miss most of all is the basement of my house on Goodwin Avenue.
There were a lot of accumulated things and tools down there. I used to go down there and putter around and "invent" stuff. I suppose a lot of it was 90% fantasy and 10% construction, but whatever came of it seemed to give me peace and a feeling that I had made contact with something.
Most of the tools were real old things that my grandfather brought from Norway in 1900. He and my dad still used them and I liked how they felt in my hands when I used them. The rest of the tools were the ones my dad got when he took a course in diesel engineering and tools he bought to maintain the house.
These tools enabled me to make anything I wanted or thought I needed, and that felt good. I also made a connection with my dad and granddad through inanimate objects that all of us held at one time or the other.
Going down in the basement also allowed me to get out of the stuff going on upstairs when my dad had one too many beers. Or the loneliness I felt when no one was home but me on a rainy Saturday afternoon.
I already implied in my other posts that most of all I miss the faces of my buddies and all the other faces I encountered in my neighborhood...there ARE good neighborhoods on StatNisland...places where folks like me really came from. I could never say I was from Frederick like I could say I was from Westerleigh.
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