OK Christmas, here's one for you:
What's Your Business Sign?
You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid
having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and
socializing which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now.
Least compatible with Sales.
Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing without a
degree." You are also self centered and paranoid. Unless someone calls you
and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with customers
so you can "concentrate on the big picture." You seek admiration for your
golf game throughout your life.
Unable to control anything in your personal life, you are instead
content to completely control everything that happens at your workplace.
Often even YOU don't understand what you are saying but who the hell can
tell. It is written that Geeks shall inherit the Earth.
(One of only two signs that actually studied in school). It is said
that ninety percent of all Personal Ads are placed by engineers.You can be
happy with yourself; your office is full of all the latest "ergo dynamic"
gadgets. However, we all know what is really causing your "carpal tunnel
The only other sign that studied in school. You are mostly immune
from office politics. You are the most feared person in the organization;
combined with your extreme organizational traits, the majority of rumors
concerning you say that you are completely insane.
6) HUMAN RESOURCES
Ironically, given your access to confidential information,you tend to
be the biggest gossip within the organization. Possibly the only other
person that does less work than marketing, you are unable to return any
calls today because you have to get a haircut, have lunch AND then mail a letter.
7) MANAGEMENT/MIDDLE MANAGEMENT
Catty, cut-throat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain
at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single
decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of meetings you can
schedule for yourself. Best suited to marry other "Middle Managers" as
everyone in you social circle is a "Middle Manager."
8) SENIOR MANAGEMENT
(See above - Same sign, different title)
9) CUSTOMER SERVICE
Bright, cheery, positive, you are a fifty cent bus ride from taking
your own life. As children very few of you asked your parents for a little
cubicle for your room and a headset so you could pretend to play "Customer
Service." Continually passed over for promotions, your best bet is to
sleep with your manager.
Lacking any specific knowledge, you use acronyms to avoid revealing
your utter lack of experience. You have convinced yourself that your
"skills" are in demand and that you could get a higher paying job with any
other organization in a heartbeat. You will spend an eternity contemplating
these career opportunities without ever taking direct action.
11) RECRUITER, "HEADHUNTER"
As a "person" that profits from the success of others, you are
disdained by most people who actually work for a living. Paid on commission
and susceptible to alcoholism, your ulcers and frequent heart attacks
correspond directly with fluctuations in the stock market.
12) PARTNER, PRESIDENT, CEO
You are brilliant or lucky. Your inability to figure out complex
systems such as the fax machine suggest the latter.
13) GOVERNMENT WORKER
Paid to take days off. Government workers are genius inventors, like
the invention of new Holidays. They usually suffer from deep depression or
anxiety and usually commit serious crimes while on the job...thus the term
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