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How many of you are breaking these laws!!! These are REALLY on the books!!! Sorry if the last one offends anyone, but I didn't write these!

New York State Laws

A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.

It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.

A license must be purchased before hanging clothes on a clothesline.

The penalty for jumping off a building is death.

New Yorkers cannot dissolve a marriage for irreconcilable differences, unless they both agree to it. That rarely happens, since one party regularly says "no" to the other, or there wouldn't be a reason to dissolve the marriage. If one of the spouses says "no" to the divorce, the other party has to prove that the spouse saying "no" was at fault. Fault could be one of four terrible things.

If the spouse has abandoned the other spouse, that is, left the house for a year or if there hasn't been sexual relations for a year (how do you prove that?). Another one of the four terrible things, an oft cited fault, is to assert that the spouse has treated the other spouse with physical or mental cruelty. This is usually the case in most deteriorating marriages, but for the court's purposes, yelling and screaming is not usually enough; pictures of bruises taken in the emergency room might suffice. Divorce will be easy if the spouse has been imprisoned for two or three years. Much more difficult is the last fault, adultery. This keeps a lot of private detectives in business, since lipstick on the collar is not proof. It also means that lawyers get paid to "prove" fault, or on the other side, to show how lame the opposing side's "fault" claim is.

A person may not walk around on Sundays with an ice cream cone in his/her pocket.
It's illegal to speak to a person while riding in an elevator and you must fold your hand while looking towards the foward opening door.

Slippers are not to be worn after 10:00 P.M.

City Laws

New York

Citizens may not greet each other by "putting one's thumb to the nose and wiggling the fingers".

A man may not turn around and look at a woman in "that way," and violators are forced to wear horse blinders.

It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing."

You may not smoke within 100 feet of the entrance to a public building.

Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.

Staten Island

You may only water your lawn if the hose is held in your hand.

It is illegal for a father to call his son a "faggot" or "queer" in an effort to curb "girlie behavior."

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