TOMDGIMP gave you excellent advise when he told you to ~Follow Your Heart~. I was going to say the exact same thing. No one can help you make your decisions. That's something you have to do. All others can do is help support you in your decisions. I do have a bit of first hand information on this subject, and, for what it's worth to you, I'll share it with you now.
Last year I was taking a class at the College Of Staten Island. My Professor very graciously allowed me to use (with their approval of course) my fellow classmates in a study. It was a Metaphysical Study, and they all knew that as I had expressed it (naturally) when I addressed the class. I'm telling you this because it's very pertinent to this discussion. Anyway, after class there was a young Indian girl, a classmate, who sought me out for private counsel. She was absolutely frantic...and she asked me to please do a reading for her. She also told me the background to her desire for it. You see, her Father wanted to arrange a marriage for her. She said that that was their ~way~...their custom. She told me that she did not want to be a party to that. I can't honestly remember right now if she said that she was interested in someone particular or not but she made it clear that she wanted to make her own choices. She wanted me to "see" if I could tell her whether or not she would marry soon. I will tell you now, what I told her.
There are no cards, no charts, or crystal balls that can "see" what she will decide. Decisions are a part of the ever flowing ~Wave~ of the Life Force....they're actually our inheritance as human beings. Every decision we make, or don't make, propels us to our next point in Time and Space. The only thing constant or "predictable" about life is that it's constantly changing! That of course, includes the decisions we make. Breaking traditions that are eons old is a toughy. I know that the girl I was speaking to wanted to make a break, but I'm not so sure she was ready.
It sounds kind of funny to even say it now, but technically speaking I myself came from a mixed background. *LOL* My Mother is 100% Scandinavian and my Father was 100% Italian. That meant two very different cultures coming together as well as two very different religions. I personally know of many "mixed" marriages and some of them continue on with each party retaining the link to their roots. I know of others, like my parents, where one of the parties "converted" from their original religion. In my situation it was my Mother who converted. She became a Catholic. While that might not seem like such a biggy, it was in her family! *S* EGADS! Some of the members of her family took it as quite a slap in the face that she converted. Regardless of all of that, she did it. She didn't do it for my Father....and she didn't NOT do it because of her Family. She followed her own ~Heart~ and made her own decisions... for her own reasons. That's all any of us can do. That's all any of us should do. The bottom line here, or central theme if you will, is ~Boundaries~. While the lines of demarcation can sometimes appear fuzzy....in reality, all we can be is us...and that means that in any given relationship....we're only a fraction of the final decision. That also means that we have to at least try to accept everyone else for who they are...and that includes the decisions they make. And, for the record, a refusal to make a decision, is really a decision in disguise.
You may very well care deeply for this girl, and she may very well care deeply for you, but she would have to go against eons of family tradition to have a relationship with you and she may not be ready to do that. It would take a lot of personal strength. I'm not saying it can't be done or that it shouldn't be done...for love. *S* In the course of Time & Space it's been done countless times, but SHE is the one and only one that can make that decision. No one can force her or try to coerce her or plead with her to do it. Trust me, you wouldn't want someone that way anyway although I'm sure you already know that. *S* You've made your feelings and intentions about her clear to her, and that's GOOD, but that's about all you can do. The rest of it is in her hands.
~God~ ~Allah~...WHATEVER you call The Life Force, gave us Life....what we do with it...is up to us.
Best of Luck and ~Blessings~ to You!
Staten Island WebŪ Forums Index.